In life, we inevitably get old. Everyone starts as a baby and passes away as an older person, who has hopefully lived many joyful years and experienced many things. With this in mind, there is a good chance you will be alive to see your parents get old and become elderly parents before hopefully you become an elderly parent to your children.
When your parents are elderly, they may need additional support from you to help them with their daily needs. They may need you to cook for them (or arrange their meals each day for them), you may need to arrange changes to their home, to make it safer for them (or you may need to arrange specialist care) and you will need to help them when they are getting ill – there are many different illnesses that you can get when you get older, such as diabetic pressure ulcers.
To help you with your elderly parents, we have put together our guide on six ways to look after them as they get older. From cooking for them to making changes to their home, we hope we have given you some useful information which can help you. Keep on reading to learn more.
Establish a routine
Having a routine is very important to an elderly person! A routine gives them something to look forward to as well as a structure to their week. When you are getting older, the amount of things you can do in a week is a lot less, so having a routine where you get to go out for a walk or visit a local cafe, can mean a lot. When you have a routine in place, try your best not to change this routine too much, as this can be confusing and bring on unnecessary stress.
Keep in touch with health professionals
As you can imagine, the older you get, the more medical help you are likely to need. As you get older, your memory isn’t as good, so you tend to forget things. For this reason, it’s important you keep your elderly parent’s medical check-ups up-to-date and keep in touch with the health professionals, to ensure nothing is missed. If you are going to a private clinic, establish the costs beforehand, so you are prepared for these costs and so you can budget for the monthly fees. It’s ok to use your parent’s money for the treatments as that’s what their money is there for. Don’t feel like you need to take on the whole financial burden.
Ensure it’s easy for your elderly parents to communicate with you
Before your elderly parents go into a care home, they may be living at home on their own. If they are, having a simple way for them to reach you in case of an emergency is very useful. Remember, their memory isn’t going to be as sharp as it once was and they may not be able to use the latest technology to reach you on channels like WhatsApp or Facebook Messenger. Instead, make sure your number is saved on speed dial and have it written down for them somewhere, so they can easily access it. If they can’t travel anymore, getting them to video time relatives is a fun way for them to get in touch and it will help them feel less lonely.
Consider your financial situation
Sadly, money does have to be a consideration when looking after elderly parents. As they get older, the cost to look after them can increase and be very expensive, if they need medical treatment and you choose to go private. We would advise putting together a spreadsheet to budget the monthly costs of looking after them. Don’t be afraid to speak to them about the financial side of things, as it could be that they have saved enough money to cover the costs that you may have to start paying. The last thing you want is money stresses, as this can affect your mental health.
Think about your own needs
It’s not selfish to think about your own needs when looking after someone. You may have the best intentions in the world, but sometimes, you need to put yourself first, in order to live your life and do your best to support them at the same time. When we speak about thinking about your own needs, we mean taking considerations about your career, where you live, your own health and your children, etc. You can’t let yourself suffer when looking after others. You need to find a way to balance everything, to keep everyone happy.
Always include your elderly parents in decision-making
You may be looking after your elderly parents, but this doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have a say in their life. Always include them in any decision-making processes, when it involves them. Not only does this help them to feel empowered (which as you get older, can be more difficult) but it also helps them to know what’s happening to them, for example, if things are getting too difficult and you are thinking of putting them in a care home.
As they get older and require more care, this is when more decision-making may be needed. But as they get older, this can be a harder conversation to have with them. This is why it’s important you are patient and don’t cut them out, as you don’t want them to feel excluded from anything.
The older your parents get, the more support they are going to need. It’s important that you don’t burden yourself with supporting them when it’s getting too much, as this can be extremely difficult. Instead, be prepared to get professional help when required.
What tips would you recommend to someone looking after their elderly parents? Which of the above tips did you find most useful? Is there anything missing in our guide on looking after elderly parents that you think we should be adding? Let us know in the comment box below, we look forward to hearing from you.
